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Computer Sick?

314.609.6165
Funny
This ought to make
you feel better
about your computer skills!
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Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Female customer: A white one...
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Tech support: Click on the 'my computer'
icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
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Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
Tech support: Would you click on "start" for me and...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm
not Bill Gates.
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Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print.
Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted
the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the
computer still says it can't find it...
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Customer: I have problems printing in red..
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.
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Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.
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Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer:! OK
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is
there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah..that one does
work...
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Tech support: Your password is the small letter "a" as in apple,
a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters ?
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Customer: can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
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Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
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Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen
saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it
disappears.
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Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do
I get the circle around it?
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A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with
her printer.
Tech support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good
point.
The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and
his printer is working fine."
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And last but not least...
Tech support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys
at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of
the screen.
Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: I don't have a P.
Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech support: "P".....on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT
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WELCOME
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You
have officially entered the NO GEEK ZONE. We are
just ordinary people solving ordinary computer problems in
the St. Louis area. With all of the virus', spyware and
adware that enter your computer (without you even knowing
it), you need someone to give you peace of mind. We're here
to serve you! Our job is to help you or your company with
all of your computer-related needs. Through our economical
mobile and remote computer repair, website design and networking
solutions (including DSL installation), we can help you
achieve your desired goal.
We do both residential and commercial projects in the
greater St. Louis and surrounding areas. For a more
complete list of our services, click on "Services".
Thank You and look forward to serving you
soon,
Tony
Owner/technician
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"Our Success is
Determined by Your Success"
"Our Success is
Determined by Your Success" |
|
L.A. Design & Computer Services is your place for on-site computer
repair in the St. Louis, Missouri area. We specialize in virus removal,
spyware removal, tune-up,
DSL installation, networking, wireless, training, data recovery, website
design, software installation and consultation.
HELP IS ON THE WAY
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